Thursday, November 16, 2006

on bitter endings and sweet beginnings...

I've pretty much considered this blog dead. After the pressures of college life ended I almost went full on against my job. I had no time to rest and no time to spare looking for hotspots or to even lug my laptop around with me.

Graduation was fine. I got goosebumps when we were made to transfer the tassle from one side to the other. But that's it... No glowing feeling, no special ingkling inside to throw my graduation cap to high heavens (except maybe to drop on the bimbo's head - aka "she who hath no idea what she was yapping about during her graduation speech").

I expected too much from the affair. Maybe I wanted to cry, y'know? To signal that I am no longer a happy-go-lucky college student who had the world at his fingertips...to welcome the fact that I am now a fledgling engineer struggling to prove himself. But I guess the fact that I have been working for the last two trimesters of my scholastic life sapped the "naivite" out of it all.

I'm not that stupid graduate clutching his portfolio close to his chest wondering if he can get a job that pays him more than his monthly allowance. I now knew how shitty life was. How a diploma from my oh-so-distinguished alma mater can only help you stick your foot in the door. The cold hard fact was that I knew how much it sucked to work. I knew that government taxes are like highway robbery against what you earn. I know how managers get to go on two-hour lunches while I had ask permission just to pee.

I have long since been disenchanted by the "real world". I already know that youth is like alcohol, it tastes bad in the beginning (childhood), then you get the buzz (teenage years), then you get drunk and forget your inhibitions (college), and then YOU FUCKING WAKE UP WITH THE WORST GODDAMN HANG-OVER. Reality sucks...deal with it.

I wonder if we'd still look like this ten years from now.

No comments: